UNCOMMEN: BrokenSample

Lost & Found Dad

When exactly did I lose my way? When did I stop being the husband God called me to be? It can be a very humbling question to ask yourself truthfully. 

We can so quickly look at our spouse and find all the things we think they should be doing better, or the problems that may have started since becoming married. It sometimes begins with that harsh word, that should have been understanding or kind. Along the way, sin happens. Empty promises, porn, and a hurting marriage. Then one day, another man pays your hurting wife a compliment. It makes her feel wanted. Several text messages lead to lunch. Affairs can be many things; most common are emotional and physical.

When we live in sin, we must also live in the consequences of that sin. I had no idea any of this was about to happen, but God knew. A few months prior, God began to call me to draw close to Him. He was preparing me for the journey I had no idea I was about to go on.

She did not feel we could ever reconcile. She did not want any part of any marital help I had suggested. When I asked my wife to leave, I started calling myself a "single dad." My life shattered. My marriage fell apart; my relationship and trust with my kids were broken.

How could I forgive her? How could she forgive me? Realize this! Both parties are responsible for a marriage that falls apart. We could sit here all day pointing fingers at whose offenses are the worst.

She was gone. I felt alone, and I blamed myself. It was just the kids and me. Their mom was around to help get them off to school and back home, but that was about it. We argued every time we crossed paths. I felt empty. Felt like part of me was missing.

"Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted." — Psalm 25:16

As I sat next to my bed, crying, I was asking God why? I could barely begin to sort through all these feelings that had me floored. For God, this is a perfect place to start. He can start anywhere in our lives. Sadly for most of us, it takes us falling on our faces before we look up and listen.

Over these next six days, we will discover how, when it seems you have lost it all, there is surrender, obedience, transformation, healing, purpose, and victory.

Uncommen Challenge: Change your focus from your circumstances, to focus on Jesus to provide all you need during these trials.