10 Steps For Dealing With AngerSample

Step 3 — Give Up Your Rights to Anger

The way you address anger is a matter of your will. You can and must take authority over your emotions and choose to release the anger.

Don’t try to justify your anger.

Don’t make excuses for it.

Don’t transfer it to or blame others.

Own up to your feelings through prayer: “God, help me to deal with this quickly and effectively. Don’t let anger poison my soul.”

I once heard someone describe it this way: “Anger is like spilling something on a clean white shirt. If you clean it quickly and in the right way, there’s a good chance it won’t become a lasting stain. But if you ignore it and wait too long to treat the stain, your garment likely is ruined forever.” And this does not mean spewing it onto the perceived offender right away. That doesn’t solve your anger problem; it inflames it.

“But I have a right to be angry,” a person might say. “If I don’t speak up immediately, I’ll lose my opportunity to let the other person know that I’m worthy of respect.”

Or you may hear someone else explain, “I have a right to respond in a way that lets a person know I have a right to my own feelings and to express them in any way I want, including anger.”

The truth is that you don’t have any of these so-called rights. Completely surrendering your anger to God means you are giving up your “right” to get even with a person who wronged you or made you angry. You are saying, “I won’t try to hurt you or seek payback.” You are willing to forgive, no matter what the person did to you. And when you do surrender completely, you will find that God heals, blesses, and guides you in ways that are truly miraculous.