Calming Angry KidsSample

The Victor’s Crown

My teen daughter raised her voice in anger as she played a video game with her sister. The two of them were fighting over a character, and her emotions were getting heated. I could see from her face that she was about to have a meltdown. 

When her dad tried to encourage her to calm down, she raised her voice at him too. Since I was sitting next to her, I leaned forward and spoke in a low tone. “Think about what you’re saying and your tone. Do you need time to calm yourself?” 

She sucked in a deep breath, and I watched her face relax. Then she released the breath she’d been holding. “No, I’m all right,” she told me. Then, without prompting, she turned back to her sister and talked in a calm voice. John and I looked at each other. He cocked an eyebrow. I knew what he was thinking. Is this really our kid? It was hard to believe such a simple interaction was so effective, but the result demonstrated to us how far our daughter had come—how far we’d come. Our kids still get angry at times, but I’m amazed by how often they’re able to calm themselves. 

My grandmother, who lives with us, has witnessed all this—the hard days and the good ones. And she is a sweet reminder that even the most difficult trials we face last only for a season. After living eighty-eight years, not only does she see the challenges our family has faced as minor, but she also knows the rewards that come with days, weeks, and years of perseverance. More than once, when I was weary and at the end of my rope, Grandma has looked at me with a twinkle in her eyes and said, “You’ll get your crown someday, sweetheart. You’ll get your crown.” 

This is the crown I think my grandma was referring to. God calls us to finish strong, despite life’s challenges, and promises to give us a victor’s crown if we do. As I’ve faithfully endured, I have discovered a new hope for our family here on earth. We’ve faced many challenges, but as we’ve worked through them, we have grown strong together. Galatians 6:9 tells us, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” It’s not just John and I who are reaping a harvest. Our children are too. As they’ve let down the walls around their hearts, not only have they invited John and me in more and more, but they’ve invited God in more too. As my children choose to follow God, they can look forward to their eternal reward, their own victor’s crown. 

We hope you enjoyed the Calming Angry Kids reading plan. You can learn more about Tricia Goyer and her book Calming Angry Kids here.